I'll stay with you 'til my seas are dried up (Cream)

Wie geht's?

A chance conversation during dinner at Joe's Garage in Christchurch recently has resulted in my reconnection with sport on TV.

I was in Christchurch for a series of meetings and I'd asked my District Principal pals if they had Sky Sport and how much they paid a month for it.

Quite a lot was the answer. In the past, my forever problem with Sky was that I'd get it for sport and we'd never watch anything else really (Would I Lie To You being an expensive exception). 

But Arsenal have started the season well, the NFL season has just started, and the World Cup in Qatar is on the horizon (kicks off November 20 - happens once every four years) - so I'm motivated.

During the conversation Sky Sport Now was mentioned - via an app I could have just sport and I can watch on my phone or on my home TV via my device and an HDMI cord.

All for $40 a month. Oh baby!

That means I can now watch the English Premier League (we're playing Spurs this coming weekend - please boys!), England slog through to relegation in the Nations League via a loss to Italy (Italy! Who failed to make the World Cup), the Steelers lose to New England Patriots (that one was really painful), but balancing all that - the ABs smashed Australia, retained the Bledisloe and won the Rugby Championship after a horror start to the competition. That's more like it!!

Love and peace - Wozza

Don't forget to wash your hands before sup-per (Elaine to George)

Wie geht's?

A recent morning conversation at work touched on American vs British humour and our preferences.

First of all - let's agree that there is a distinct difference between them. Oh yes - there is!

Generally speaking, each reflects their distinctive cultures.

Brits are characterised by a certain pessimism and that is strongly reflected in their sense of humor. Satire that considers the absurdity of life, clever puns, and sarcasm rule the roost. 

On the other hand, Americans are more optimistic, and their humor is overt and exaggerated. They don’t value subtlety and wit to the same degree as Brits; being big, bold, and charismatic are more esteemed than cracking clever jokes. Slapstick and physical humour are preferred, as is an observational type of comedy.

Obviously these aren't hard and fast rules. Monty Python is mainly clever clogs absurdist British humour but the big bold physical humour also contributed to their success in America.

When I was growing up in suburban Auckland it was radio funnies by British icons like The Clitheroe Kid, The Goon Show, and Hancock's Half Hour that got me started. 

Then, with one TV channel, it was a steady stream of great comedy shows like Dad's Army, Hogan's Heroes, I Dream Of Jeannie, Green Acres, Steptoe And Son, Monty Python's Flying Circus, Morecombe and Wise, The Carol Burnett Show, The Two Ronnies, The Benny Hill Show, The Beverly Hillbillies, and The Andy Griffith Show.

A quick count reveals 6 British and 6 American shows in that list - an even split! I rest my case, m'lord.

Given that grounding, it's not surprising that my favourite comedy show ever is Seinfeld - ostensibly an American observational kind of show about nothing, which in fact covers everything.

It has it all - slapstick (mostly featuring Kramer and George), clever word play (everyone), sarcasm (mostly from Jerry and Elaine),  absurdist humour (mostly Jerry and George), satire (mostly from Jerry and George) and cracking clever jokes.

Although I have all the DVD sets, I'm currently viewing it again from the beginning on Netflix during Jacky's bath time. She's not a fan. Currently I'm up to Season 5.

Last night's episode (The Sniffing Accountant) had me laughing so much I couldn't open my eyes!! Apart from Elaine's killer sarcastic putdown of George (he's living with his parents) that headlines this post, highlights centre on Kramer doing the drinking while smoking trick and before that getting hit with a folding bar top - kills me every time. I'm laughing days later, just thinking about it!

Love and peace - Wozza

 

It's as easy to learn as your ABC; it’s murder by numbers, 1, 2, 3 (The Police)

Photo by Markus Krisetya on Unsplash

Wie geht's?

Have you ever noticed that numbers are everywhere and the exact number you need is often not at hand?

A large dollop of frustration happened today as I tried (in vain) to find my IRD number.

You see, I am about to turn 65 years old - retirement age in Nu Zild. I know! Crazy talk, right? 

I don't intend to retire from work for a spell, but I do now qualify for the NZ government superannuation, a.k.a. the pension. As I've been contributing to government coffers by working and contributing my share of tax since 1983, I figure that it's fair I now get a little back.

To apply for that though, I needed to fill out forms and one form requires, you guessed it - my IRD number (amidst a sea of other numbers - bank account; mobile phone; pin codes; birth dates and on and on).

To even get that far, I had to have a client number and then an MSD number.

I had to wait until I got home last night to find the IRD one on an old document called 'Important Dates and Addresses'.

So, in the end it took two days to complete all the steps necessary, which included, just when I thought I'd finished, the need for Jacky to verify that she's married to me.

More numbers as she now needed a client number, an MSD number and yada yada yada.

Perhaps the thinking is that the more difficult the process, the less inclined retired people will be to keep going with it.

Gotta tell ya - it was a pretty mind numbing exercise.

Love and peace - Wozza

Her Majesty's a pretty nice girl (The Beatles)

Wie geht's?

When she wakes up, Jacky has a habit of looking immediately at the latest news on her phone and yelled out the other day as I was getting dressed three rooms away, "The Queen's died!"

For a lot of people, it was a bit of a surprise hearing that news - even though she was in her mid nineties, somehow you think people like the Queen are above all that earthly stuff. That is until age catches up with them, as it does all of us.

The topic of conversation at school on Friday was naturally about that news. When I arrived at school, I lowered the school's flag to half-mast as a mark of respect and after getting home, I watched the rolling coverage on the TV with Jacky.

Then on Saturday I watched the remembrance service from St Paul's Cathedral. I was doing quite well too, until the singing of the 23rd Psalm and the Lord's Prayer that is. The communal recitation of the prayer on these occasions reminds me of similar times and gets to me.

Why did I do all that?

Although I've never had any close contact with the Royals, thanks to Look and Learn, my upbringing (by Dulcie Mary Purdy especially) and being part of the baby boomer generation that has known nothing else but the Elizabethan era, I am a fan of the monarchy in general and the Queen in particular.

Why Look and Learn? All those stories about Kings and Queens; King Arthur and his knights; Chivalry; Sir Walter Scott. All put their hooks in me via Look and Learn.

She and the monarchy represent things I care about - tradition, respect, a sense of service and duty, and a commitment to things. Their charity work is immense and the income generated from tourism shouldn't be discounted.

I guess it's easy to sneer at these things and point to colonialism and the louche lifestyle of some royals (Andrew has done a lot of harm in many ways) but the Queen is the Queen.

I remember the royal visits to NZ  over the years and I remember at Royal Oak Primary being part of a parade for the Governor General in the 1960s. He was a big deal! 

As God Save The Queen was played in cinemas before a movie played, we would stand as a mark of respect.

So, yes, I have royalist sensibilities. I don't think that's a bad thing. It's certainly something I share with millions of others.

Watching landmark occasions like royal weddings on TV is always observed in our house, and I even have a vivid memory of watching Charles' investiture as the Prince of Wales way back in 1969 at Caernarfon Castle (right). I was twelve and it seemed to last a looong time, but I watched the whole thing.

Jacky and I have had a few tangential brushes with royalty over the years with visits to the Palace of Holyroodhouse (where Jacky was politely told to keep off the grass), Buckingham Palace, The Tower Of London, and the royal mews. We love all that pomp and circumstance.

I also love the quiet dignity the British have during these historic times. They provide a great example to us amid changed times in New Zealand. 

The faces of those in St Paul's seemed to me to represent a modern picture of Britain that I will cherish. All races and ages and sexes looked to be there. No one was distracted, everyone was paying careful attention, no one was out of control emotionally, all were reflective and respectful. It was very British.

I liked that.

Love and peace - WNP

Sugar, ah, honey, honey - you are my candy girl (The Archies)

Wie geht's?

Have you ever considered how hard it is to find a drink that both tastes good and is good for you (apart from water that is)?

I faced this very conundrum this week as I attempted to avoid bad for me drinks like Coke classic and Coke no sugar - my staples (if you want to know why they are bad for you please feel free to contact the light of my life a.k.a. Jacky Purdy and our fourth awesome child - Jade Purdy who have strong opinions on this stuff).

During the week, I went to the Four Square by school and checked out the drinks' chillers.

Yikes - everything was varying degrees of bad to terrible for me - sugar or caffeine loadings, artificial sweeteners or else artificial other things.

I settled on a bottle of Ribena blackcurrant fruit juice - figuring all the no this, no that, no the other thing, was cool.

When I got back to work my staff reacted with horror and shock. 'What are you doing?', they asked! 'Didn't you realise it's full of sugar?', they asked?

'Sugar?', I said. 'It says no this, no that, no the other stuff!!'

Doh! Of course it was, stoopid! So, I donated the Ribena to Thomas and sought help from the internet and my staff.

Green tea came top of the pops. So I tried that - good for me? sure. Tastes good? Nah-har.

Kombucha!! one of my helpful teachers suggested.

Hmmm. I tried a cola version and....actually...yes! Tastes good (or at least tastes like a cola) and is good for me.

Jade's verdict? Yes, okay, she begrudgingly admitted. It is very good for you, but in small doses.

Phew. So water and Kombucha (if I can find it) for me from now onwards.

Love and peace - Wozza

P.S. I feel duty bound and, full disclosure, I did need a brief pause on the water and Kombucha as I was out to dinner with colleagues last night and enjoyed a beer and a coke (classic). The road to ruin is paved with good intentions but - starting tomorrow...

I need a job, I'm willing to work, but I need a job (Chickenfoot)

Wie geht's?

One of my amigos - LooLoo, sent me this picture with the message, "Found the perfect job for you back in good old Auckland!"

Seems Roger is hiring!!

Let's see...

• Comprehensive musical knowledge? Tick.
• Current and historic popular music? Second bit = big tick. Current stuff - if it's in Mojo magazine I'm all over it so - yes - Tick.
• Classical and jazz? Second bit = yeah man I dig. First bit I'm okay on all the biggies - so half a tick.
• Tidy and friendly? Tick Tick.
• Computer literacy? Tick.

So that's 7 and a half ticks out of 8 Roger! I'm your man!

Love and peace - Wozza