Thursday, March 24, 2016

It's a genuine problem, you won't try to work it out at all, you just pass it by, pass it by (The Who)

Dear Geeta

Please excuse this open letter to answer your question (Warren - how are you enjoying being 'back home' - was it a difficult transition?).

Interestingly, a number of people have also inquired about my feelings lately and I've fobbed them off by saying, "Hmm, that's a really good question" and...and that is it. 

The truth will set you free but I don't really know what my truth is. 

Ambivalence is the best way to describe my feelings right now Geeta. Ambivalence.

As I understand it, it's defined as the experience of having 'an attitude towards something that contains both positively and negatively valanced components'. 

It's the perfect word and is my best answer to the question; I'm ambivalent. 

But that's not what I mainly want to write about just now. Actually, I want to write about the question and consider how it can be answered. 

The 'how are you feeling' question is usually trotted out by reporters keen to illicit some emotional pay off for their story. 

It's a tough one to answer for a number of reasons. One possible answer is  a glib 'I'm fine' but it's not usually the honest option. Another possible answer is a more truthful one but one that then leads to a whole other conversation and a whole series of 'why?' probes.

It's particularly tough for me because I always aim to answer a direct question with a direct answer. I want to be honest but instead I've opted for the fob off of late; I guess through a need to preserve some privacy and a need to examine my feelings carefully before articulating them to strangers. By the way, no one who knows me well has actually asked that question, which is interesting.

All of which leads me, inexorably, back to 'ambivalent'.

Raining and finally getting more of an autumnal feel this end.

Love and peace - Wozza

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