Remember, one man's ceiling is another man's floor (Paul Simon)

Photo by Neven Krcmarek on Unsplash

Wie geht's?

So, here we are, as promised - this one is about my flaws. I said I'd limit it to the top 100, but let's see where I get to, shall we?

1. Gullibility - I'm quick to believe stories. A current student keeps feeding me tales and I swallow them up every time.
2. Loyalty - it can go either way, be a strength or a flaw, but my tendency is to stick with the tried and true. I inherited this trait from my father. I can't help being influenced by him*. The expression 'loyal to a fault' applies.
3. I also tend to get defensive with negative feedback and criticism. I'm aware of it and I've been working at it over the last couple of decades. It remains a WIP.
4. The obsessive-compulsive side of my personality manifests itself in my music collection. I am a completist with certain artists and labels. It began as a teenager with The Beatles and John Lennon but has spread over the last 30 years. That's it for the emotional/personality flaws. 
5. In terms of social and interpersonal ones I will own up to a reclusive gene, and a struggle with an aspect of phatic communion - small talk. I tend to get awkward in some social settings.
6. A behavioural flaw centres on my fog dwelling. It may appear that I'm absent-minded at times but the reality is that when I'm completely locked in/ focussed I enter into a kind of foggy dream state where nothing else exists. I understand that this can be very frustrating to key people in my life.

How many was that? Six or seven (ha ha). 

Love and peace - Wozza

*BTW it was his birthday on the weekend (he would have been 98). His influence remains strongly with me as you can tell by my frequent mentions in these posts.  

Further on in the game, waiting up till the children came. Place your bets, no regrets. We got married (Paul McCartney)

Nearly twenty years ago (2007)

Wie geht's?

Part one ended at April 21st, 2004. From then until 2007 we lived in Leigh-on-sea, an old picturesque fishing village in Essex. Victoria Road holds many memories: foxes destroying rubbish bags at night; Jade inconsolable when Adam returned to NZ; Jacky and the girls dancing in the snow; walking to the train station; walks to Rayleigh Castle; the 30 second walk to the Broadway for Costcutters, Fives, and the pet store. I loved Victoria Road.  

At the start of 2007 we returned to NZ, in time for me to start at Stratford High School, while Jacky worked at Taranaki Base Hospital.

Having lived, worked, and had many adventures in Qatar, The UAE, and China, we were, by April 21st, 2014 back living again in Hawke's Bay - Otane to be specific. I was working at Woodford House, Jacky was at Hastings' Hospital.

Keegan, Adam, Samantha, and Jade were now in their twenties and all grown up. Yes - we were now empty nesters! It's a strange feeling. We'd spent twenty years as a family of six living together, and now the kids were no longer kids. They were now busy living their own lives, without needing us in the same way. As I said, it's a strange feeling.

The photo from that time, taken during a tour of The Emirates stadium, implies we were still in the UK but we'd flown back for a holiday while living in Otane.

OngaOnga, April 2024.

That brings us bang up to date - April 21st, 2024. After a stint in Maungaturoto and Caterham (Surrey), we now find ourselves living in Central Hawke's Bay. I work for OneSchool Global and Jacky is at Hastings' Hospital again.

As for the rock steady Purdy crew: Keegan lives in China; Adam lives in Melbourne with his wife Ashleigh and their daughter - Poppy; Samantha is in Los Angeles with her partner, Andrew;  Jade is in Palmerston North with her son Asher and her partner Chris.

Living their lives.

Jacky and I head into our 5th decade together with an eye for fresh adventures. Things like retirement will eventually have to be considered. But not yet.

Love and peace - Wozza/WNP/dad/Abu Keegan/El Presidente (Greg and Kev will understand)

Just as well love was all we ever wanted, It was all we ever had (Paul McCartney)

Off on our mystery ride, 1984.

Wie gehts?

Welcome to the first of a two-parter to commemorate our ruby wedding anniversary. First part takes in the first 20 years from 1984 to 2004.

April 21, 1984 has been the subject of a few posts over the years. Brief summary - the two of us lived at 31C Lorna Street in New Plymouth. There were no children yet. Doesn't seem real in many ways.

I was into my second year of teaching at New Plymouth Boys' High School, Jacky was modelling and working for Whites Department Store in New Plymouth.

Our first decade saw us up to our elbows in dirty nappies - literally. It was one after another until four sproglettes invaded our space. So, it was a decade of sleepless nights, single income struggles, cloth nappy rotation (if disposal nappies were around we never used them - crazy but our belts were tight. Good thing we were both skinny to start with), and vehicle upgrades.

When I first met Jacky, I drove an orange Mini. We'd moved from that to inheriting mum's Chevette, then buying a station wagon and by 1994 we needed a white Ford van. We had bench seats fitted so that we could fit our family of six aboard. This was also useful when we added Annette Sivak and her two kids to the car-pool into work while living in Wakefield.

Second decade, still smiling!

Our second decade April 21st, 1994 - 2004 and our four millennials had joined us in Wakefield, in the South Island of NZ: Keegan 9; Adam 7; Samantha nearly 5; Jade 2.

During that first decade I'd gained a promotion after working at Macleans College in Auckland. So, we'd moved to Nelson for me to work at Waimea College. After ten years of babies, babies, and more babies Jacky was thinking about retraining as a nurse. Fair enough! We'd soon be on the move - back to Auckland.

We had made some great friends in Nelson and had some terrific holidays with them and our old Auckland friends. In terms of parenting, we were all flying the plane while building it. The kids were about to turn into teenagers - were we prepared? Were we eck as like!

Embarking on our third decade in the UK, 2004

On our 20th anniversary, April 21st, 2004, we were living at Alpha St in Cambridge, but after our trip to Edinburgh in 2003 we were keen to move to the UK. Leigh-on-sea in England (Victoria Road to be precise) would become our home by the end of 2004. Keegan was now studying at Waikato University, Adam and Samantha were at Cambridge High School, Jade was about to start secondary school.

So, at the time, it seemed an ideal opportunity for a gigantic upheaval. We sold up pretty much everything and set sail for blighty with a suitcase each. I soon found that shedding a skin is a fine abstract idea but it gets messy in practical terms.

As soon as we landed, half the family wanted to go 'back home'.

In the UK I began work at The King John School in Benfleet and Jacky was a nurse at a variety of London hospitals.

Our third decade ahead had plenty of challenges but we managed our way through them together. Somehow.

Next up - the second part taking in 2004 to 2024.

Love and peace - Wozza

Like a virgin, touched for the very first time (Madonna)

 

The first 12 - 18 Korma Ave. Royal Oak, Auckland, 1971

Wie geht's?

Warning for the fandamilly - this one's about music and records...

That grainy photo above was taken by me over fifty years ago. It shows my record collection at the time.

I thought I'd recreate it for you and talk about the distance of time.

First albums - 50 plus years later in Hawke's Bay 2022

Last week, I found myself in Hamilton on school biznis. After searching Record Shops Near Me on my phone I visited Tron Records. Of course, right!

While there I noticed a sign the owner had put up saying something like, 'Some of these records are 50 to 60 years old, so please consider that as it relates to quality'. That was the basic message and it got me thinking.

Doh!! Of course they're that old! And of course they will be! Miraculous that some of the records from that time are in near mint condition really.

My record collection goes back 50 to 60 years as well. 

The black and white photo of my first records (above) has a few that I've lost along the way and the singles outnumber the albums because they were cheaper and much more available to my early teenage budget which came from pocket money and returning glass pop bottles to the corner dairy on Pah Rd. That's also why there were some budget albums and compilations in the mix.

But I still have the majority of them:

• Santana (Santana) - 1969
• The Cowsills (All Time Hits) - 1970
• Headband (Happen Out) - 1971
• Led Zeppelin (III) - 1970
• The Beatles (Hey Jude) - 1970
• The Monkees (Pisces, Aquarius, Capricorn & Jones Ltd) - 1967
• The Hollies (Reflection) - 1969
• Various (Loxene Golden Disc 1971) - 1971
• Various (Solid Gold Hits Vol II) - 1971
• Kenny Rogers and The First Edition (Greatest Hits) - 1969
• Cream (Swlabr) - 1970
• Small Faces (Biggest Small Faces) - 1972 (not in that original photo but acquired shortly after it)

I notice that those albums pretty much cover my core musical taste (I can hear Jacky say, "What taste?") that exists still: harmonic pop songs, hard rock guitar, country rock, blues rock. 

It was a nicely representative collection of cities (San Francisco, Liverpool, Manchester, London), and countries (New Zealand, England, America) as well.

In terms of distance - there isn't any really. Although I'm roughly 50 years older, I am still in touch with that teenage Wozza. I haven't changed much inside myself and certainly my interests haven't changed at all.

Listening to those records now takes me instantly back to my bedroom at 18 Korma Avenue and my Garrard SP25 Mk 3 turntable (yes, I still do listen to them from time to time, but the Garrard has long gone).

50 plus years of additions to the first 12

In other respects - it's some 50 years later and I am another, very different, experienced Wozza (husband, father, grandfather) and the collection has had 50 years of additions and subtractions.

Those first 12 though remain a very special touchstone back to my 13 year old self.

Love and peace - Wozza

No time for a gentle rain. No time for my watch and chain. No time for revolving doors (The Guess Who)

Photo by John Fornander on Unsplash

Wie geht's?

One of those weeks, I'm afraid - full on - it zipped past me, whipped out a hand and cuffed me on the old noggin and left me flailing and sprawling in the dust - cream crackered.

A series of days filled with stuff that I needed to do for others; I can always tell because I always realise at some point that I haven't blogged for a spell. Nor have I responded to many personal emails.

Me time is what I'm talking about. Got got got got no time. For me.

Didn't help that I slept on after this morning's alarm (always set for 4.30am Monday to Friday) which meant a pressured start to my day instead of 30 mins to do this blog. Doh!!

Ah well. Meh. So a few days slip by. 

The good news - blogging does eventually re-enter my consciousness and hey presto - this post.

You will be relieved to know, oh blogosphere, that I have resolved to write something more sagacious next time this blog rolls around.

Love and peace - El Wozza

So the days float through my eyes but still the days seem the same (David Bowie)

Photo by Nick van den Berg on Unsplash

Wie geht's?

After my birthday posts to Keegan and Adam, Jacky casually remarked that I'd changed a lot.

"Huh? Really?" I said. "I don't think I've changed at all". To which she laughed. Almost hysterically.

I wanted to check so I commissioned her to retake the shot from 37 years ago.

Here they are together:

Hint - the one on the left was taken 37 years later, in case you were wondering.

Okay. Yeah. I've changed a bit on the outside - but same dude inside! And he's aged about 25.

Merry Christmas and hope you have a happy new year - Wozza

I turned the key, I broke it off and I crossed the Rubicon (Bob Dylan)

Photo by Yiqun Tang on Unsplash

Wie geht's?

Third and final installment (for a while) of my poetry from long ago and far away:

3. The moving sky

Autumn leaves bunch up against my window while
I spend some harmless time watching leaves falling;
falling into themselves - this way and that way, falling down.

The sun hides behind the tall wall, sending out
a sharp outline. Viewed by many down the years,
the painted wall is roughly textured, off-blue, aged.

Clouds are fairly skudding across the milky blue sky
but the breeze down here is mild,
so I sit in shirt sleeves on this May morning.

The red leaves stand in relief against the evergreen,
trying to be last hold outs of a summer eeking away.
There are many trees outside this window, beyond the wall: palm trees, pines, silver birches.

It's good to watch them shimmy gracefully
against the moving sky, accentuating the positive.

 

Love and peace - Wozza

I embrace my love, put down my hair and I crossed the Rubicon (Bob Dylan)

Photo by Sydney Herron on Unsplash

Wie geht's?

Here's my second poem from long ago and far away:

2. Floating free

I see the shadows of

the future in that white

island which is San Francisco


From Tiburon I watch

the misty sea

edging south over San Francisco

and the island of the city

is truly floating free at last

Love and peace - Wozza

I pawned my watch, I paid my debts and I crossed the Rubicon (Bob Dylan)

Photo by Aimee Burrows on Unsplash

Wie geht's?

Thought for this one I'd revisit some of my poetry from long ago and far away. 

Three at random, over the next three posts, and the link between the natural world and my inner world is very obvious.

Here's the first one from around 30 years ago:

1. Mist

There's a mist on the lake - night isn't too

far away.

Faces of the past come to mind

as if the mist has called them.

 

They were maybe always there -

in the rarified air.

Lake Taupo lies somewhere beyond the mist -

keeping its secrets.

 

It's been a cold day - lazy drizzle

As I stood on the river bank - listening

to the sound of the reeds on the rushing

water and my line

making darts in

and out of the

currents - in the

shallows and 

in the ripples.

 

Coldest part 

of the country

apparently - as

I stood under the shelter of the blackberry

bush and let the rain

come down 

 

back to the river,

 

back to the faces.

 

 

Love and peace - Wozza

Check it out now, the funk soul brother (Fatboy Slim)

Wie geht's?

As I was researching the pictures for that Wozza in the seventies celebration (see back a couple of posts) I came across a veritable mountain of family snaps featuring me and my younger brother. 

Our dad was a keen amateur photographer and he took loads of pictures of us together. I hadn't quite realised how many!

Before our lives diverged at the end of 1981 (I moved away from home to flat by myself while going to Auckland Secondary Teachers' College), we were 'the boys', as in Dulcie, Graham and the boys.

From our perspective in 2020, those 22 years when our lives intersected, from 1959 to 1981, have become a relatively short lived period in our lives. 

For much of that time, though, as these pictures show, we were tight as. 

Off to Sunday school

Love and peace - Ross' older brother

Soon as three o'clock rolls around, you finally lay your burden down, close up your books, get out of your seat, down the halls and into the street (Chuck Berry)

Lord Asher (a.k.a. A.W.R. P-H)

Wie geht's?

Our stuff from the UK finally, FINALLY!!, arrives this Friday. Bang on the last day of term. 

Considering we left the UK four months ago, we've been waiting (and suffering the lack of our winter clothes) for a long time now.

The package includes some furniture which will help complete the inside picture (speaking of which - the two weeks of holidays will give a chance to take and post some pictures of our new home).

Love that snap from Jade of Lord Asher above. 

Co-incidentally, I was thumbing through a photo album and came across one of this handsome bloke. 

Am I crazy, or is there a strong family likeness going on??

Love and peace - WNP

Pass notes #2

Wie geht's?

Age: 61 (today in fact)

Appearance: grey hair, different glasses, but essentially the same simple guy

Disposition: Happy, content, positive, thirsting

Where: Caterham, Surrey, United Kingdom

What are you doing there? Living. Soaking it all up. I may never pass this way again, according to Seals and Crofts, so I'm enjoying every day.

But why England? I'm me here. I belong. I can't really describe the feeling beyond that without getting all mystical and misty eyed.

Okay, okay. I think I get it. Have there been any messages from friends and relatives so far? Indeed there have. Ross rang yesterday, cuz Christine sent me a gift from Bury (I'm waiting for LOML to wake up before I open it) and Jade rang yesterday as well. Plus there are my crazy friends (GK and Simmsy), my mentor (WOH Gibbs), former colleagues, relatives and friends who got in touch via Facebook - marvelous for birthdays and the like!

Righty-ho, enjoy your day Wozza: Chur bro.

Don't say: When do you intend to grow up and settle down?

Do say: Forward!

Love and peace - Warren Ono Purdy

Your love is making me strong (Eric Clapton)

Margo and Keegan

Wie geht's?

From time to time I use this blog as a way to explain my thoughts and confront my emotions. Sadly, this is one of those times.

This week, a close friend of mine died.

I met her at Auckland University in 1980, just as my school mates and undergraduate mates left varsity after their degrees and headed off to work. Distances start quickly. I needed new friendships.

Margo and I were both doing our masters degree in English. Being an intellectual giant, she  was whizzing through hers and about to start her PhD. I was just starting out in my extremely naive way.

A rebel, she'd married early after school (wearing black much to mother's horror which was the point), and had been out and about before returning to academic study. 

She was now with an American guy, an artist, a Vietnam Vet. Called Clay.

Holy holy. I latched onto them like a limpet and became a frequent visitor to their Blockhouse Bay flat.

We went to movies together, concerts, events, dinners at Chances R, plays, bookstores. We hung out - in the MA room on top of the English Department and at their flat. 

And we talked and analysed and discussed and I listened, absorbed, and my brain leaped! A lot!

We became close. So close that the American guy called Clay was standing beside me as my Best Man when I married Jacqueline Frances Smith in 1984. Margo was MC. Like everything she did - she was superb, accomplished, peerless. Just right.

When Keegan Warren Purdy came along, our choice for Godparents was clearly for Margo and Clay.

From then till now we stayed in touch as she went into advertising with Ogilvy and Mather (she was brilliant) and then back to Auckland University's as Head of the Adult Education Department/PhD programme (she was outstanding as a mentor).

Now she's gone from our lives.

Obviously, that news is devastating to take. 

She had that special touch - all of her network of fanatical supporters knew they had a special one on one relationship with her. When, really truly, that was reserved for Clay.

If you go back to those recent posts on the onion layers, you will understand that I feel, selfishly, as if the people who really really really know me has been reduced by one (it's a very short list to begin with).

Until we meet again, Margo, may God hold you in the palm of his hand.

Love - W

P.S. Wie geht's? is German. It means 'How are you?' Margo started all her letters and postcards to me with this greeting. Her first thought was for me (the reader). I'll be starting posts with this from now.

You say I'm a dreamer, we're two of a kind (The Thompson Twins)

Core personality - my essential self.

One potential measure of the self—how much you’re able to stay true to your principles despite what the world throws at you, is an interesting angle to consider.

Much of how I see myself is framed by that.

That's where honesty, personal integrity and loyalty to things like people and brands comes from because I like stability in some facets of my life.

Being a teacher forever, married to Jacky for 34 years, and a loyal Marks And Sparks customer comes, I guess, from the fact my father had the same haircut for 82 years - it worked for him, so why change a winning style. 

Less obvious is my openness - to wit this post and other stuff on these blogs. One of my poetry anthologies was called WYSIWYG 

But the self isn’t just the difference between what we might be, if we lived up to our ideals, and what we are. 

I find myself on a quixotic quest (maybe it started with Jonny Quest) to challenge myself, to learn, to improve.

You can say I'm a watcher, a reflector, a doer, a thinker, a dreamer (you know I'm not the only one).

So, there you go: that's brand Wozza for ya from my pov.

However, none of us are alone, none of us are completely defined by our own view of ourselves. We’re constantly bouncing off other people and looking at other people as a mirror of us. Our very sense of who we are is intertwined with what we see when we see other people look at us.

In that way - you create your version of me, regardless!

Love and peace 

You may call me Warren, you may call me Wozza
You may call me Nerraw, you may call me Purdstah
You may call me WNP, you may call me son
You may call me anything, because we're all one

Older times we're missing (Little River Band)

Various Purdys in the kitchen at Rochdene, Easter 2017,

The young and the restless crew met up for Easter. Adam and Ashleigh were visiting from Melbourne and Keegan joined the party from Auckland.

Predictably we talked about Jade and Samantha - elsewhere on the planet this time 'round, while catching up on news, reminiscing and dodging intellectual family banter (Adam - "shut up Keegan").

Good times. Good times.

Love and peace - Wozza

Things that go to make up a life (Genesis)

Family Man (You may say I'm a dreamer - Chapter 9 part 1)

All the worlds I could have conquered
Are all inside of me
I have found the secret
Set my devils free
Now I want to raise my children
Proud and true and strong
Now I know the answer
I've looked for so long -
I'm a family man
Working every day for my family

Dragon (Family Man)

All baby pictures retell a familiar story: human babies are completely dependent on other people; human babies are supremely vulnerable. 

Babies have no control over what pictures are taken of them for instance. They just have to lie back and take it. 

Parents, holding their new babies are all the same as well. We all feel like this is the first and most important moment in the history of the world - and we're always right, you can see it in our faces! 

We suddenly get it - we have become our parents. We are now re-experiencing the moment we were born. We sense the connections. Bam. Right there. Back, and back, and back, and back, through the generations. 

It's a magic moment. 

I've been extremely lucky, having had four children with Jacky, becoming a family man!

This post is the start of the last chapter to my original autobiography. 

By way of introduction, I proudly present to you the cast of characters in Warren and Jacky's family.

1

Wozza's world creator,
Dulcie Mary Purdy, and her first son.

I was in good hands!

2

Then there was Jacqueline Frances Smith

Hair now became very important, 
even if it was a top knot.

3

A serene Keegan Warren Purdy, 1984

KWP and his mum who models 'the look' 
I was pointing out!

4

Adam Lennon Purdy

Adam (our special little guy)
makes four. Xmas 1986.

5

Samantha Mary Purdy, 1989.

Bright eyed, looking for action.

6

And then there were six as Jade completes the set!

Jade Michelle Purdy, 1990something
(LOL, joke Jade - 1991 right!)

Love and peace - Dad